Where Fault Lies: A Survivor's Story of Game, Shame & Blame by Carrie May Lucas
My rating: 3 of 5 stars
When Carrie got in touch with me about reading her memoir, I debated on whether or not it was something I wanted to read. I don't like reading about difficult situations, but I felt that I couldn't ignore this story. It was a hard read, it took me almost a month to finish the book but I'm glad I accepted the request and that I pushed myself to finish reading Carrie's story.
Carrie is a single mom who decided to move with her young daughter across Washington State to Seattle. She had gone through a divorce and was trying to find herself again. She felt that the move would be a good thing for the two of them. Things seemed to be going great for a while before everything changed. Carrie had a job she liked, a group of friends, and she finally found a guy who could deal with her idea of what she wanted in a relationship. Carrie was looking for a relationship that didn't feel like it was taking over her life, a relationship that involved two independent people who were happy to spend whatever time they could together.
When things started to go bad in the relationship, I found myself starting to get angry because Carrie was making excuses for his behavior and their own sexual history. When the major sexual assault happened, Carrie again exhibited behavior of someone in an abusive relationship. It was so upsetting to read because Carrie had been such a strong woman before these events. This assault just broke her and my heart broke for her. The strong woman I saw in Carrie came back out when she was able to receive the help she needed to deal with the assault.
It must have taken a lot for Carrie to share her story and I thank her for sharing her story. I have a feeling that other women going through abusive relationships and suffering after a sexual assault, can use this book to see that others have been there and have survived.
I had a few small problems with the book. I felt that it could have used a bit more editing. I know Carrie was being true to herself, but she presents her self in a way that found me hard to connect with her. This lack of connection made the first part of the book hard to get into, I found myself not really caring about some of the things that she was writing about and it was part of the struggle in reading the book.